How old are you? Are you a mom now or still in your sweet little tweeny years looking ahead to what could be? Well…which age you are matters because if you’re that second type of lady, you most likely think on occasion…moms be CRAZY! I admit to you my dear…I was once with you. But these days I’m being slapped in the face with mom realities that I once thought were crazy. Let me share a few that have happened recently.
Last year I was asked if I do the “mom dance” in the car. I was like “ehh?” “You know, where you bop your head and make your index fingers go up and down at the top of the stearing wheel.” replied a sweet 13 year old. My very honest thought at that moment was, “heck no I don’t. I’m a mom..not a dork.” Welp. Gulp. Swallow my previous thoughts. Two months ago I was head bopping, index finger moving along to….wait, what?!!! I AM that dorky mom! NOOOO! Ahh well…bop. bop. bop.
Man it’s CRAZY gross when moms wipe their kids nose with their bare finger! You know what’s more gross? I just wiped that snot right onto his shirt because I don’t have a wipe and I’m not getting my shirt dirty. That’s right.
You, sweet teen lady. You WILL sing along to kids music without knowing it…When you’re child is not with you. You WILL leave it on for multiple minutes without one tiny brain cell going, “what on earth are you doing?!” And if you’re like me, you’ll do it with two youth girls in the car and after a minute they’ll go “UMMMM…” And you’ll realize that something inside of you changed with a kid. The part that has forgone the dream of being cool because you’re weird enough to not even notice in front of others! Now that’s crazy.
Moms with young kids don’t always shower? WHAAATTT?! Yeah. What’s.the.point. I mean…some days you just know it’s not worth the effort. I once thought this was so disgusting. Like..get out of your jammies..yoga pants..and dirty t-shirt and put yourself together for goodness sake.
Why would a mom lie to her child. CRAZY lady. I’m sorry…did you say Thomas? You mean that ridiculous little engine who makes the SAME MISTAKE every episode and NEVER delivers the loads properly or on time? Yeah. That dude had to go night-night. And by the way…Chick-fil-a ran out of cookies. Bummer.
Why do moms look so crazy eyed sometimes? Why do they look so frazzled? I’m sorry…did you? No, you know what…DON”T EVEN GO THERE.
Do moms realize how crazy they look with their high pitched voice dancing around trying to get their kid to do something only to pull out a treat to get them to comply? Don’t they know they are just spoiling that child and a bratty kid will turn into a bratty adult. Well…I turned out alright…moving on.
I’ll never be crazy enough to …… … …… . YEAH. YOU. WILL.
I wonder what other crazy mom stuff I’ve done and thought I would never dare do? You?